©2018 Hailey Heartless. Vancouver, British Columbia.

M/s & GFE

May 20, 2017

I talk openly on my blog and social media about being a pro Domme in terms of it being sex work. This is something that not many pro Dommes do because it can cost you clients. Clients don't like to think of us in terms of sex workers, they like to think of us as badass women, Goddesses that they pay tribute to. I think this is true as well, and I feel the need that some Dommes have to separate themselves from sex work is mostly due to stigma and marketing. I also don't think acknowledging professional BDSM as a form of sex work should dissuade serious kinksters from booking with me, nor should it put illusions in newbies heads that I'm willing to have sexual intercourse with them.

 

I feel there's many differences between what pro Dommes do from other sex workers, although when I speak of those differences it's more to acknowledge my experience and privilege, and remember that when I talk about sex work, to not talk over full service sex workers or masseuses. It's definitely not to elevate myself above women who do other forms of sex work. That type of thinking is called whorearchy, and it's something I try not to buy into.

 

 

 Despite the differences between full service sex work and BDSM services, I feel like there are parallels to be made. One of those parallels can be found in Mistress/slave play. As an old school lifestyle kinkster, I've been trained that Mistress/slave relationships are one of the strongest bonds that exist in the BDSM world. They're something that's entered into after a period of consideration, then a period of training, and once they're entered into they're unbreakable. To an old hat kinkster, breaking a Mistress/slave relationship can be seen as a massive failure on the part of the Mistress and can hurt your reputation. In this sense, Mistress/slave relationships are sort of one of the most intimate forms of connection in the BDSM world.

 

 Many full service sex workers will offer a service they call girlfriend experience. As someone who doesn't have any experience as a full service sex worker, it's not my place to define what that term means, but my understanding from talking to sex workers that offer girlfriend experience is that it's a form of sex work that attempts to provide a more intimate and romantic experience compared to more traditional sex work.

 

As an old school kinkster who became a professional Domme, I used to have serious reservations about being called Mistress by clients. In my mind, that was a title that meant something. Eventually I found peace with it by accepting that Mistress is not just a title for a woman who has a bond with a slave or slaves, but also the traditional title used in professional BDSM for decades. Wearing that title was an homage to pro Dommes and Dominatricies who laid the foundation for the work I do today. At this point in my career, I would often tell clients, "you may call me Mistress, but not 'my Mistress.' There's a difference, and as someone who loves kink you should learn it."

 

 

 I think that thinking changed when I started to see my clients as people purchasing an experience, and doing so for various reasons. There's all kinds of reasons people visit a pro Domme; some people have jobs or obligations that prevent them from being active in the kink community, some people don't want to invest the time and money to build a dungeon and purchase tools (for the price of two commercial grade BDSM tools, you can have an hour with me), and some people value their time so they just want to cut through all the bullshit and have their specific fantasy or need fulfilled. I think the last reason stated is why I'm okay offering Mistress/slave relationships as a service.

 

When you purchase time with a Domme, one of the things we can offer you is an experience. I know how to train slaves, I know how to collar slaves, and I know how to own and work slaves. I don't see why I shouldn't offer this experience to clients who are willing to invest in my art; the art of kink and sadism.

 

 If you want to know what it's like to be owned by a classically trained lifestyle Domme, book a session. In fact, it's worth it to book a long session. I'll make you my slave for the hour, the night, or the weekend. If you're loyal and wish to be trained, we might set a schedule and I may make you my slave on an ongoing basis. I'd love to give you an old hat, authentic Mistress/slave experience; the pro Domme's version of the girlfriend experience. You're going to love being my slave.

Please reload

Our Recent Posts

Upcoming Events: October 2018

September 24, 2018

Forced Fem Belongs to Trans Women

August 9, 2018

What's going on in my life

July 17, 2018

1/1
Please reload

Tags

Please reload